Viewing a single comment thread. View all comments

ACatInACloak t1_jbccf87 wrote

Imposter syndrome is a bitch aint it. Do I suck? Do I need to be this hard on myself to stop myself from doing a bad job? Am I actually doing a good job and being to hard on myself? When people tell me I'm doing a good job are they being honest or are they just being polite?

WHO FUCKING KNOWS

623

hauntedadrevenue666 t1_jbdd73f wrote

Then ya follow up with uh, “am I even good enough to have imposter syndrome?”

98

ACatInACloak t1_jbdh270 wrote

Oh God.... I never even thought of that one before.... thats gonna go into the rotation now

43

c4k3m4st3r5000 t1_jbeqj58 wrote

Thats like a dream within a dream stuff. Now you've given me a whole new platform to pull myself apart...

8

sileter0000 t1_jbg104t wrote

this is me when they told me about imposter syndrome. Like, yeah, no, I'm not good enough for that.

5

abaram t1_jbcqnqp wrote

Yo I go through this thought process every hour of my work life

84

PM_ME_SOME_SONGS t1_jbd2fxr wrote

Why not motivate yourself in a positive way? Who said that you need to be hard on yourself to get anywhere? Questions from my therapist.

48

smr120 t1_jbd5gk3 wrote

Because I tried that, and it did not work, and this seems to work for me. Seems like an easy choice to me.

17

White_Mocha t1_jbe2jzt wrote

Sometimes it’s easier to be hard on ourselves than taking the hard way and believing in ourselves.

21

PM_ME_SOME_SONGS t1_jbrci7j wrote

This is probably it. Motivating yourself by being hard on yourself sucks, but it works.

1

WraithNS t1_jbeezx7 wrote

Duh, because I fucking suck.

Answer to my therapist.

12

TishTashToshbaToo t1_jbg0vlu wrote

How would one do that? I read somewhere (probably in a meme) that you should talk to yourself the way you talk to your pet/child when they succeed at something small. 'Go you! You're so good at this!' or maybe just 'Stop eating that! Drop it!'

1

wasabi2knz t1_jbcy3fe wrote

It’s ok - it eventually gets better - unless I am just failing massively and no one is telling me and I am doing a terrible job and oh god oh god.

22 years in tech, 7 in consulting……

39

TheChef_ t1_jbd9rk3 wrote

Great post, I can totally relate. 15 years in tech, 6 years in Consulting here.

8

Baebel t1_jbdzt57 wrote

Use to have a team lead that would try to benefit in gaslighting the hell out of me while I was in the middle of this, and a rapidly growing state of depression. Not fun.

Things are better now, especially after she was eventually fired. I hope to never return to that state of mind ever again.

3

White_Mocha t1_jbe38xp wrote

Had a shooting partner who did the same. After I pulled myself out of depression, he forced me back in a crazy way that could create a couple of TV seasons.

3

howard416 t1_jbe82vu wrote

What is a shooting partner? Firearms practice?

3

White_Mocha t1_jbeh0en wrote

Could mean several different things, however in my case, it means someone I made YouTube sketches with. I was (or perhaps still am) an actor with an eye for cinematic quality and he’s a comedian. His toxicity made for great and highly viewed videos, but when he brought that into real life, it was way too much to deal with.

3

ganskidrums t1_jbethbv wrote

This is where comparing oneself to others actually makes sense, within reason. I agree it’s a mistake to judge your life based on milestones or achievements made by friends and family because we all have different goals and definitions of happiness.

However, in business or athletics or anything else where competition is a key component, we really need to know how we’re doing. With nothing/no one to compare ourselves to, its impossible to know whether we’re crushing it or about to be replaced.

I encounter a LOT of people who are afraid to ask for a raise when they need it, afraid to go home at the end of the day, afraid to take a full lunch break…all because they’re racing this invisible ghost and they don’t even know whether they’re winning or getting lapped.

Know where you stand. If you don’t know, ask.

3

darkthrive t1_jbdzm00 wrote

self reflection is always good, self criticism is also good but only if its constructive!

2