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rbunny111 t1_j5pn9av wrote

But I eventually got over it and we're back on good terms... or should I say eye terms

1

CHARLIE-MF-BROWN t1_j5pq0tz wrote

I'm blind so in my situation I just can't see this happening.

284

c0dyw0dy27 OP t1_j5pqdtp wrote

Replying to movielover154 (#1,471,212)

I have to agree there first but I'd rather teach my child about violence as that's more major. It's all dirty but bottom line is this joke has nothing to do with sex so let's not go down that route yeah

4

[deleted] t1_j5przz7 wrote

So i never let her wear that toy again.

3

Ok-Resist-556 t1_j5puuzu wrote

Girlfriend asked me sensually "make me scream while using two fingers..." So i poked her in the eyes

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TooShiftyForYou t1_j5q6swa wrote

I once had a girlfriend who borrowed $100 from me. When we broke up 2 years later, she gave me the $100 back.

I lost interest in that relationship.

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dadarkgtprince t1_j5qd1t4 wrote

Replying to ZarosRunescape (#1,473,685)

Seeing sex mentioned on a reddit, no. There are plenty of subs that contain that material. Seeing sex mentioned on a joke that has nothing sexual about it? Yes.

>saw something mentioning sex on pornhub?

This is the intended audience, so it's fine. A comparison for this scenario would be you went to the grocery store to buy bread but someone was there trying to sell you sex toys. Time and place

1

akhan4786 t1_j5qsb1w wrote

There's a new air freshener which works with mind control...

...it makes scents when you think about it.

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Nimonix t1_j5reegv wrote

You should poke her face, pa poke her face!

7

[deleted] t1_j5rxla8 wrote

Say it like Jimmy Carr

My girlfriend poked me in the eye

[pause] Last time I give her head (sour tone)

[pause] She’s getting snipped this weekend (upbeat)

2

Puzzled_Inflation_95 t1_j5sw1uf wrote

It's 430 am I can't sleep I had my k9 pulled yesterday and needed this lauf.

3

GuyAwks t1_j5t6330 wrote

Beauty is in the eye socket of the beholder

1

douchebaghere t1_j5tgu44 wrote

And now for unknown reasons, definitely not related to me, people aren't able to find her body, I mean her.

1

douchebaghere t1_j5thak5 wrote

And I poked her in the ass. We are a cute couple of poker players.

2

omnom08_ t1_j5thqzx wrote

The real joke here is saying they have a girlfriend

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lotsanoodles t1_j5tllev wrote

My boyfriend poked me in the eyes, now I'm cock eyed.

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Crapapple_Gtag t1_j5tql7n wrote

oh no unfortunately he stopped her i feel bad for him he must of liked it

2

coarsing_batch t1_j5tqykh wrote

Replying to CHARLIE-MF-BROWN (#1,471,195)

My husband and I are also blind. I have prosthetic eyes, but he has real ones. One day we were really getting into sex, and things were heating up until I stuck my finger directly into the back of his eyesocket. And it was not long after we’d had the worst fight we have ever had. So it was really awkward and I spent an hour trying to reassure him that I really wasn’t actually trying to kill him. He was not happy.

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lol_ole_me t1_j5u56vl wrote

You folks are twisted. I bet you remember the dead baby jokes

1

BruceWayne3011 t1_j5uekl4 wrote

Me after buying a walking stick: Look what you made me do

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BotCo_Teum t1_j5ulpyf wrote

You need to keep an eye out for this kind of thing…

2

bingouser07 t1_j5un1js wrote

So now i don't see the future of our relationship 😅

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yebutwhy t1_j5yteep wrote

Replying to coarsing_batch (#1,489,597)

You finger eye sockets… let’s not be so quick to call others weird. Like why so deep? Are you jealous of his real eyes? I’m sorry if this is all %100 true and I’m being insensitive but like I’m pretty desensitized by the internet by now, and if it is true, apparently so are you😂

1

distorted_allergy446 t1_j6nvvcc wrote

But I overcame it finally, and now we're on good terms again—or should I say eye terms?

1