yo momma so fat…

…she needs a boomerang to put on a belt.

…she absorbs chuck norris kicks.

…she thought it was safe to fart in the pool and caused a hurricane.

…court ordered her to wear a backup cam to stop sittin on children and small animals.

…she makes the kool-aid man say, “oh no!”

…when she tans with oil kids get a free slip n’ slide.

…her thigh gap has been compared to the san andreas fault.

…she finds more change between her rolls than her couch.

…she uses a jack-hammer as a vibrator.