If you can see someone, see someone. The thing is that depression is kind of like having a cold or the flu. Sometimes it's not so bad, you can muddle through for a bit and do home remedies like working out or meditation until you feel better. But sometimes it IS bad, and you cant stop coughing for weeks or it turns in to pneumonia and you need to see a doctor, or you can die from it.

Depression is not a state - it's a spectrum and a lot of people forget that there's no shame in treating it early before it gets worse, or just seeing a doctor to make sure its a mild sort. But stuff like "oh just exercise" is maybe helpful or not, in the same way that "just get some rest and eat chicken noodle soup" is helpful, but doesnt necessarily fix a bad case of the flu. And it sounds like you could use a person to talk this out with in terms of WHY youre so miserable and if you're truly still interested in your future goals and plans and whether you're in a bit of a sea change where your body already knows its not doing the right thing and your mind hasn't caught up yet.

Im sending you energy and strength and a complete lack of shame - its really really normal to deal with what youre dealing with right now