I think you're numbers remain high. I take vacations, I have savings and the house that I had that mortgage at was a 3 bedroom near a Public transit line (not in Maine.) It was on the smaller end but still in a major metro area.

Also at 400 a month food we eat almost exclusively fresh fruits veg's and meat. I won't buy processed nonsense.

Sure if you want a McMansion you need more money but this has been doable as recently as the past few years. You just have to fight lifestyle creep and actually set a budget. You don't need an over 6 figure household income to be perfectly comfortable, and able to take vacations, with kids.