Hey, Ryter99. Thanks for the opportunity to read and comment. A whimsical story of flight to freedom and togetherness. From the moment Ollie left the room I was pulling for them.

Critiquewise, this piece is peperred with expression that I found distracting. Some examples:

>... resided a residence ... versus stood a residence
>
>... sat at the edge ... could be on the edge
>
>... on his uncle's lap before his passing ... not possible after passing so redundant
>
>... no pursuers on their tail ... pursuers can only be on their tail

The plot lacks tension and the escape seems too easy. Perhaps Mrs. Kensington could be momentarily disturbed. Cliche, I know. There needs to be an obstacle of some sort and the gate is too late in the story.

Ollie apprears to be the MC. You can constrast his trepidation against his sister's by closing the psychic distance and speaking his mind at each move.

A plot turn might explain why the gate was not in their plans. Perhaps they intended anothe route but are discovered and must take the car as a last ditch option.

I still liked the story a lot and found it easy to put these issues aside and ride with the characters. Cheers.