Honestly the only good books with disabled characters I’ve read are Helen Hoang’s books, her main characters are autistic with various support needs and traits, she’s autistic herself so they’re done very well.

The part I loved was that all of her MC’s are independent and treated as adults- but they also have support needs that are shown and met by those around them.

And when I say it felt like pedophilia, I mean by the way she views him- as you said, she infantilises him a disturbed by amount and the way his disability is shown is horriblely written.