The point is to understand your current patterns of behaviors in the context of your previous life experiences which caused your brain to establish those patterns of behavior. Usually people seek therapy because those patters are maladaptive, meaning that they are behaviors that aren’t working for you. They aren’t healthy for you.

A good therapist will guide you in conversation (the therapeutic relationship) to try and uncover those previous experiences and help you connect the dots to your current behavior. Once you understand why you act or think a certain way, you can make more informed decisions about whether you will keep doing that, or try to change.

If you have a bad therapist, they won’t be good at that. It’s a hard skill. But you could also be a bad patient - either unwilling to do the work, or lacking in self-reflection to be able to connect the dots, or having very specific psychiatric conditions which prevent you from engaging in therapy honestly.

Watch some Dr K (HealthyGamerGG) videos of his sessions with various entertainers, he’s pretty good at it and you can see the process in action with a skilled therapist.

Also worth checking out the HBO drama series “In Treatment” which shows a flawed therapist getting too involved with some of his patients but mixed in with some fictional therapy sessions which are quite good (but unrealistically short).