I've always wanted to sit next to someone and do the same thing they're doing (play loud music/movie/game).

But I'm a coward.

The list of things I would confront someone on public transportation for is very short. Playing audio out loud is not one of them. Welcome to city life, I’m guessing you’re new here. This will not be the last time you see something like this. If you want to keep “confronting” these assholes you gotta be willing to fight. I know it sounds crazy but people have come to blows for less.

You’re overestimating your influence on strangers behavior on public transportation. Definitely a situation where you just move if it bothers you.

I will get downvoted I guess but what color was that person?

These people are always going to exist. The reason that people don't speak up is because they know it won't change these idiots' minds.

Two weeks ago a guy stabbed a dude in Stella’s for trying to do the right thing. Don’t underestimate how crazy somebody can be. Can you fight? Can you defend yourself? Why bother? Just move and avoid a confrontation. Nothing about that is being a coward, it’s just street smart.

Not worth it. People get stabbed for telling people to lower their music. My philosophy with everything like this is if the cops aren’t willing to do anything about it then why would I bother? I always think it’s a couple of minutes of annoyance from someone I’ll never see again and will forget about minutes later or I’ll be creating a scene that’ll have repercussions for who knows how long. Best thing to do is wear earplugs and listen to music

I believe in self. You want change? Gotta do it yourself. Should have moved. Telling someone else to accommodate for your own discomfort is the opposite of self.

It’s understandable of course. But our feelings are our responsibility.

I'm always tempted to start blaring bagpipe music out of my phone. But I try to avoid escalating situations with people who are already showing that they're assholes.

Just start talking loudly like you’re on the phone. Get him to ask you to quiet down. Assert your dominance!

That has absolutely nothing to do with the incident.

People suck

What’s the point of asking this?

Uhh??? All the racists upvoting you, whaa???

Lotsa crazy people in this city and the one next door. I know it sucks but it's best to go to the next car if it bothers you.

I wish it were, but this isn't Japan.

PATH rules: “No person shall play or operate any musical instrument or device, tape or disc player, radio or television anywhere on PATH property except with the use of personal headphones or earphones producing sounds audible only to the user thereof.”

OP wasn’t asking the person to accommodate them. OP was asking the person to follow the rules. That’s not asking others to accommodate OP. That’s asking others to not be rude.

Is the OP trolling us?

Like the saying goes:

It’s easier to don a slipper than it is to carpet the world.

Everyone has irks. My irks are quite preposterous when I get down and think about them. Even that irks me. I hate when others are listening to their devices without headphones, but the only time I’ve said something is when I have no choice to move (e.g. a plane). I try to always remember that if everyone in the world did everything exactly like me, we’d probably all kill each other. We need more balance than we think.

Steal the phone and jump out at the next stop. "It's the city, what did you expect?"

Rules once said blacks was 3/5th a person too

This is poor logic. Sure there have been bad rules in the past. Sure there are still some bad rules now. That doesn’t mean that all rules should be disregarded or all rules are meaningless. The rule in question is a good one that’s intended to promote basic courtesies between people.

My point is relying on regulations for what’s best for yourself is dumb. It’s putting your personal power in the hands of a sign. Only one person is gonna stand up for self. And that’s self.

[deleted]

Should’ve minded your business. Too many crazies nowadays, stay in your lane to avoid getting stabbed over something not worth fighting about. Goal is to get to where you’re going safely. A train full of randoms is not the place and time to try and make changes in the world.

Think of the outcome you're hoping to achieve then the probability of you reaching that outcome.

First time?

I sometimes dance really bad to the music, to the point that it's awkward and they turn it down or off to make me stop.

I haven't seen someone play a game with sound in public, but maybe I would start talking to them and act overly interested in the game that they are playing. I.E: asking how to play; giving advice; or rooting them on. Hopefully they'll get annoyed enough to want to stop being the main character.

People like this don't give a shit about impact on others. If they did then they wouldn't do it.

Does it really bother you that much? Personally, i have more important things to worry about than getting strangers i dont even know to do something they clearly dont want to do. Best to just learn to tune it out.

Edit: downvoted by Karens

Don’t like people competing with you to be The Main Character, huh?

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Engaging these people isn't worth it. At best you'll get that sass comeback. At worst they'll throw down to show what's what.

Too many people just don't care, have zero shame, and absolutely no concern for anyone else. They'll say the city made them that way.

You were supposed to keep it real.

https://youtu.be/pfz0tDQZhqs?t=43

If you're going that route I'd say slap it across the car. Make them decide to chase you or their phone but not both.

The noise cancellation feature on AirPod Pro 2’s are effective

Some one recently got beat up on the MTA for confronting someone about the loud music. I think it’s best to just not get involved since there are so many crazy people out here. If possible get some noise canceling headphones or AirPods pro to drown down the noise. Not worth losing your life over other people stupidity.

While I agree with your general point, I doubt we would all start killing each other if people stopped playing audio out loud on the path…

Or fart really loudly! Can't be more dominant than that!

*city life in the US. Trust me this is not a common occurrence in cities in Japan, Western Europe, etc

Sure yeah I thought it’d be clear I’m not speaking from a global experience on r/jerseycity lol

annoying but not worth it to say anything, frankly i’m just glad they’re not jerking off

Please be careful about blaming bystanders for not Doing anything…just in general. I politely asked a stranger on the path once to take their shopping bag off my shoes… I assumed they had done it by accident. And what it led to was a verbal altercation that lasted several minutes and got very hostile. They just didn’t like being told what to do. People who are aggressive and mentally ill can be unpredictable. Everyone around me disassociated while I was literally crying and shaking because this man was cussing me out because his property was on my body. So much more happened that I won’t bother listing here but the point is that bystanders just don’t want to go home to their families with a black eye because they tried to do something about it. In some few cases, Doing something can make a difference but it can be really dangerous if the person is aggressive

>I think us being silent in these situations reinforces this kind of behavior.

This is true only if the person is not aware they are being obnoxious. Instead, consider the possibility that the person knows they are being annoying and obnoxious by acting in that anti-social manner, and are looking for a reason to fight with someone.

Any half-socialized person knows that using loud speakers like that is going to annoy others. He knows what he is doing. You telling him about it changes nothing. So don't say anything. Just walk away (and let someone else, who wants a fight and wants the quiet - let those two handle it together).

This is a species of sub-human called an "asshole", defined by a total lack of the social skill known as "The Golden Rule". Then do what they want when they want, without a bit of consideration for its effects on other people.

You can find them just about anywhere, but situations like on the road where they intrude into your activity, or being trapped like you were on a train, are typically where their attitude of "no one else is real and has wants and needs, except for me" truly shines.

Cell phones are merely the latest way for the Asshole to make his presence known, it's direct predecessor was the boombox used to share their shitty taste in music with the known universe. It's current iteration is the car with the absurdly high-powered audio system and windows down blaring their shitty music.

Exactly, those type of people are most likely looking for a reaction

Was that the thing that happened Halloween night? I work next door and was wondering what happened.

https://old.reddit.com/r/jerseycity/comments/yjljce/man_stabbed_for_defending_jersey_city_pizzeria

The Jersey City autistic Redditor trifecta: This guy telling people to be quiet on the PATH, the guy who gave $2 to a bum at Newport, and the guy who took a bum to the ATM.

Unless you’re ready for a fight, mind your business. That’s always been the way it is, and it’s even more so now; no one wants to go viral for the wrong reasons… or worse.

Goddamn, that sucks. Hope he went home okay.

i see such issues in NYC more often then in europe. i guess this tells about cultural level of population,

there is no other way than just accept it, as i did.

for 6month living here i have seen more incedents in public transport than in whole my life.

I have a neat trick I use that works. Say the person is playing a game, I'll wait till they hit pause, or we are underground without network to ensure I'm not ruining their online game. Then, engage them in a conversation.
I'll feign interest in the game and ask them about the game they are playing, etc. They'll often stop playing and start talking with you, which is more tolerable + I've made a couple of friends this way.

Works less often for people playing loud music, but they will lower the volume to be able to hear you talking.

Slightly off topic, but anyone familiar with that guy who preaches loudly about the bible and Jesus from Newark to WTC on the Path?

That dude was super annoying.

This is jersey not NY, we should keep it that way.

It's a city, you learn to put yourself in a vacuum. You will tell him he is annoying and the next stop a whole band will come on and play a whole set

Villain origin story

Unless you bought a First Class ticket, we're all in this together. I have moved to another location in a car or even to another car in the case of MTA if I am finding someone particularly annoying. It's definitely not worth taking a chance that this is a belligerent, psycho just daring someone to say something. Mind your business, stay safe.

Same. You just never know how someone will react: you can’t predict level of craziness. It’s attention seeking behavior, you don’t know what else they are seeking.

Get real bagpipes and truly commit to the bit.

Tell the conductor. They will have the police remove the individual from the train. It may cause delays but that's a solution for you.

That wasn’t a rule, that was systemic racism specifically built to keep ex-slaves in a box. How the fuck does that even compare to wearing headphones in a public place and showing consideration for others?

You know what? I’m out because you took an unnecessary hard left turn here.

Pretty sure everyone is bothered by it. Fairly certain the perp has zero spatial/auditory awareness and is likely a shitty human being. Hey could you get out of the way so my crew can breakdance on this crowded PATH train?

We have a guy for that!

Agreed. Just the other day on the Upper West Side a man was beat up for OP’s exact scenario, asking someone to turn down their music. It’s not right, but it’s not worth it to test just how crazy a random person is, especially since they are already clearly very comfortable violating social norms.

https://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/nyc-crime/ny-loud-music-subway-beatdown-nypd-20221028-2rhrmho64bephpgqzs23rwhcry-story.html

Anyone who does anything obtrusive on public trans is a complete asshole.

I speak up but I'm selective about when I speak up. If the person looks angry or unhinged, I may move to another section of the train. If the person looks to be on their way to the office or is a tourist with their whole family there, and they're making someone uncomfortable, then yea I may speak up.

Even better than consumer-grade earbuds is a set of Etymōtic monitors. I have an ER2SE and properly inserted they're the closest thing to dead silence

Tons of people do it. People are just rude, selfish, and don‘t give a fuck. Just let it go. otherwise you‘ll be upset and get into an argument every train ride.

I think you should ride the train with headphones. It makes the ride immensely more enjoyable. And if I didn't have them, I would have moved. You can't expect others to have spoken up, without even knowing if they were bothered. Why would they engage in a fight with someone because you don't like the sound of their game?

The people who do that probably won’t listen to reason or in good faith if you asked them to use headphones. It’s annoying as hell but I usually mind my business and hope somebody else will say something, like a conductor or a PA cop or something. As annoying as it is, it’s so benign compared to other things that happen on trains that I don’t bother.

Last time this shit happened , I turned around and farted a SBD in the face of the offender .

This is a normal part of African American culture

Americans are disrespectful and low class

hood rats will be hood rats.

Common on NYC subways too. Degradation of manners in public space continues.