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Theninjared t1_ixx2kft wrote

Do you have a hobby that involves socializing?

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KiwiCatPNW t1_ixx2kxy wrote

Probably bumble and select the friendship thing lol, I will be moving to NJ also, I am from the PNW, worried I wont be able to relate to the east coast peeps.

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chikunshak t1_ixx2ly5 wrote

People everywhere are interested in making relationships. It is likely that they have something intelligent to say, as well, and your approach would benefit from recalibration.

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holeeray t1_ixx3zx5 wrote

You're probably gonna take this the wrong way, but maybe if you try to tone down the being so full of yourself aspect, you might have a bit more luck. I'm sure you're god's gift to the Earth and being all European and exotic and shit people should naturally want to flock to you, but being a bit humble might help to make you a bit more approachable.

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delilahgrass t1_ixx6i64 wrote

You’ve got a world class university up the street. New Brunswick and the surrounding area is full of post graduates your age. Find some interests and hobbies or take some classes there if you can. It’s got plenty of international students too so it may be easier finding people with similar backgrounds that you can connect to initially.

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holeeray t1_ixx6jpx wrote

Replying to [deleted] (#698,403)

Alright, humility might be a bit difficult for you so how about we start with some self-awareness? It's obviously you really think you're unique and want to peacock. Unfortunately, this is a pretty diverse area so you're probably not bringing anything new to the table.

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phunaholic t1_ixx6qcw wrote

Asbury Park has a lot of bars and social clubs.

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comsixfleet t1_ixx7dt6 wrote

Maybe start by not gloating about how tall and good looking you are

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Sn_Orpheus t1_ixx7m4u wrote

There's a website www.meetup.com that you should look into. Lots of clubs for lots of interests. If there's nothing there, maybe it's time to try something new and join one of them. Do you Mountain bike? Ski? Play chess? Kayak? Hike? Like to discuss books? Try something new and maybe you'll meet some interesting people. I believe that you can audit classes at Princeton for free.

I think the other person suggesting you be a little more humble is recommending that you don't play off what you look like (very fit and good looking) and perhaps try attracting people by your personality instead.

Sincerely mean it, I wish you well.

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resilientwarrior t1_ixx8iux wrote

Do you play a sport? Try and find some recreational adult leagues

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HeadCatMomCat t1_ixxbd18 wrote

Join a wine club. See what discussions or events are open to public at Princeton and Rutgers. Book clubs are also a good avenue.

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greatyhope t1_ixxe4l2 wrote

Local church with young crowed. Most go to social.

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velveteendreamstreet t1_ixxferm wrote

Replying to [deleted] (#699,693)

That’s extremely superficial to say “I don’t want to go out in public with bad looking people”. Just because someone does not look particularly attractive does not mean they are not well mannered or don’t have respect for others.

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greatyhope t1_ixxfmkw wrote

Replying to [deleted] (#699,721)

Well, yeah worship is important but also a big gathering place. Be yourself and go with the flow. A lot of churches have young adult service, 20s ~30s. A lot of different activities.

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greatyhope t1_ixxhatw wrote

Replying to [deleted] (#700,006)

It's a church, everyone's welcome, they want new members. Most churches have new members welcome team. They help you feel welcome and introduce you to the members. Pretty chill from my experience.

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LaurensPhotos t1_ixxjs14 wrote

Use bumble or tinder my dude it’s an app you can use. Tinder is mainly for hookups I’ve noticed, bumble you can possibly find a long time partner

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thebongofamandabynes t1_ixy4e5t wrote

Replying to holeeray (#698,680)

Not OP but u mean like west coast Europeans? Cuz he didn't say he was from like California. Or do you mean the West compared to the far east (ie Kamchatka, Vladivostok, etc). Sorry stoned af and confused rn.

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Administrative_Elk66 t1_ixyf78l wrote

Finding an active Meetup Group helps. Volunteering in something of interest to you , then you can ask those people where people go. Depending where you are hanging out , it's true that a lot of people have known each other a long time and the social groups are more established. But going in with an open mind will take you much further than putting people down.

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Ordinary-Rice1830 t1_ixypj2i wrote

First off, it’s actually nice to see someone come off as so confident. Good for you.

Where are you from in Europe? Bc I won’t really understand what you mean by “conversation style” until I know what country. As someone who enjoys a good, deep intellectual conversation, I urge you to get out there and find volunteering opportunities or sports meet-ups. You’ll find that you meet intellectual people in the least expected places. If you open your mind a bit, you might be surprised by what even the “simplest” of people have to offer conversation wise. Don’t go looking for it - you’ll find it. The more people you meet from all walks of life, the bigger the chance you’ll find what you’re looking for to fill that gap. But you aren’t going to find it at Djais!

I moved here at 28 with 3 kids and cried because the moms were older and “clicky” and wanted nothing to do with me. I joined my local fire department, became a firefighter, and met some of coolest people ever. I started surfing in the winter by myself. There’s pickup soccer. I’m not sure what’s in Middlesex (I’m in Monmouth) but I’m sure you have options!

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Hisuinooka t1_ixyt7cu wrote

Replying to Sn_Orpheus (#698,735)

&gt;>recommending that you don't play off what you look like (very fit and good looking) and perhaps try attracting people by your personality instead<<

yes that worked for me my entire life!

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HarryHaller73 t1_ixzcr4e wrote

If you're looking for a long term relationship, go to church. If you want casual sex, use the internet.

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HarryHaller73 t1_ixzczup wrote

Replying to [deleted] (#699,721)

If the church is nondenominational protestant, or protestant in general with the exception of very conservative ones like lutheran, it's very casual. Alot of young people go there to meet others like them, but they will quickly sniff out someone who's using it for the sole purpose of dating. The more spiritual you seem, the better.

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illegalnuggets t1_iy0bek6 wrote

I go to small music festivals… i can advise, if you like bass music/have an open mind to it. :) There’s a lot in Philly but also ny and starting to happen in nj. Very open scene, and easy to make lasting friendships. Good luuuucckk

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ScumbagMacbeth t1_iy4lqp7 wrote

Replying to [deleted] (#718,758)

You need to find hobbies or interests you can meet people through. Being attractive and rich is not really a personality or a way to meet people. Join a sport, a club, volunteer work, etc.

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