TwilitSky t1_ix6zvc2 wrote on November 21, 2022 at 5:36 AM

Oh, it gets so much dumber:

>Authorities say Loyd threw his birth certificate and ID out of the window as he fled. The report says that as he was driving away, Loyd saw the police driving towards the bank in response to the robbery, which scared him into throwing the money out of the truck. Loyd allegedly texted his roommate, telling her that her truck was stolen and that she should listen to the police scanner.

He was also wearing an ankle monitor due to a previous robbery.

Fake_William_Shatner t1_ix8aubo wrote on November 21, 2022 at 2:56 PM

>which scared him into throwing the money out of the truck.

Okay.

> Loyd allegedly texted his roommate, telling her that her truck was stolen

Working on an alibi?

>He was also wearing an ankle monitor due to a previous robbery.

Next level. Ascends to patron saint of cluelessness. Have to ask where Harry was in all of this, grooming dogs?

sunshinepanther t1_ixanqjj wrote on November 22, 2022 at 12:46 AM

I feel like he wanted to go back to jail. Seems least crazy of the possibilities.

Fake_William_Shatner t1_ixasi3h wrote on November 22, 2022 at 1:23 AM

I suppose if you can't function in a complex world, Prison might be your only hope. And that is super sad.

But it seems like he panicked -- or did he? Throws out the money and then tells sister to report van stolen. So they go after him or don't think he used her van. WHO uses their own van for a heist, anyway?

This poor guy just sounds like h's just not that bright. He could have found less risky and easier ways to get thrown in prison.

its_not_you_its_ye t1_ixb8pcy wrote on November 22, 2022 at 3:27 AM

I love the shade thrown in this quote:

>“Michael Conley Loyd pleaded guilty to one count of bank robbery in federal court to “prove a point” to his lover, though he never said what his point was.”