Submitted by Phillimon t3_110a6af in relationship_advice
My new girlfriend, like we just made it official a few days ago, wants me to stop being friends with my best friend. During the talking phase I made sure to let her know my best friend is is a woman, and that we're platonic, and that I really value the friendship. She was "cool" with her, even went on a few double dates with my bestie and her boyfriend. However now that we're dating she wants me to stop being friends with her, says it's inappropriate and disrespectful to spend time with a girl that isn't her.
I'm a little confused on why this is a problem now. Especially since the bestie and I are literally just bros. We met at work, had very similar tastes in music, video games and show/movies. I've known her for years, and we've always been platonic. We literally just hang out and watch TV shows or movie and smoke weed. Her boyfriend trusts me, and we get along great. Bestie was there for me with my last break up, talked with me and really helped me get in the right head space. I've done the same with her. Bestie is a large part of my life and support network.
If she keeps pressuring me to cut Bestie out of my life I feel like I'm going to break up with her. Any advice would be appreciated.
Edit: To elaborate on the bestie we met at work, and still work together, when we were both in our 20s. We have similar tastes in music and nerd things like D&D. Over time we started hanging out outside of work. The usual way people become friends lol.
Edit 2: Friends if we were going to hook up we would have done so already. We have had plenty of opportunities to become sexual and/or romantic and not taken them. We've been friends for over 4 years so it's not like a new infatuation or anything. Hell I've know Bestie longer than GF and Bestie HELPED me get GF.
Edit 3: More details, Both Bestie and Myself are very clear about how we're close but just friends. Her current long term boyfriend knows about me and we're friends as well. I let GF know about Bestie at the earliest opportunity. We went on double dates and I thought they got along. I'm honestly completely confused about this. I really like GF, and was hoping that the transparency would quell any suspicion. I've been upfront from the start about it.
Last Edit: Hey thanks everyone. I appreciate the advice so much. You're all telling me what I pretty much knew I was really really hoping I was overlooking something. At this point its a forgone conclusion well break up. If we don't I'll update it with the miracle. Mods can lock this or whatever.