Submitted by ThrowRAPitatopotato t3_11og1e4 in relationship_advice
Basically the title but my (28f) fiancé (28m) who we’ll call Dave was at work and asked me to email him some documents from his laptop which he left at home.
I logged on and saw an open conversation between him and his friend Paul and they had mentioned my name. I was curious and wanted to see what the were talking about (I know I was invading his privacy but curiosity got the best of me). Paul messaged Dave about how he was more attracted to his wife’s looks over personality. I scrolled up and saw Dave had said he was more attracted to my personality than my looks and nearly broke up with me early on in our relationship but stopped himself because looks weren’t important to him. I was devastated when I read those messages as I had no idea my fiancé thought I wasn’t attractive.
I waited for him to come home and told him what I found and he immediately apologised and started crying and told me he loved me and didn’t mean for me to find out. I asked for some space and went to stay with my parents for the past few days.
Besides this Dave and I have never had any issues, a few fights here and there but nothing we couldn’t get past together.
Whilst looks aren’t the biggest thing, his message made me doubt whether I’d be an idiot going back to him or if I should go the other way.
I hope this is enough information as I’ve never posted before and any advise is appreciated.
Edit to add : I apologised for snooping when I talked to him after work and we’re past it and he was understandably upset but that’s something we were able to get past.
Thanks for everyone’s input so far it’s been helpful and I think I’ll talk to him with all of your comments in mind.