Submitted by throwaway080721 t3_xvl0wa in relationship_advice

My(32F) partner (34M) of 10 yrs has rarely initiated reconciliation when we get into an argument. He is non-confrontational and while i do understand this, i can't help but be unhappy with being the person in the relationship whose job it is to "fix" the problem after a fight.

Whenever we argue, our pattern is usually cold-shoulders for me and for him, it's pretending like nothing's wrong. I try to pull-away so that he reaches out to fix things. But over the many years, I almost always end up being the one who reaches out and actually talk about the problem. He normally just proceeds to act like normal even though I've visibly withdrawn from our situation.

He is the best when things are good, but I can't help but feel alone when we hit rough patches. I have talked to him several times before about how I feel each time this happens. Now we are in a month-long argument, with no signs of him having a serious talk with me about our current issue. I don't want to be the one to bring it up anymore as I've done all these years...

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