[25M] [24M] Forgiving infidelity without being controlling/toxic.

Submitted by 4centavos t3_1006oqr in relationship_advice

Hi. Last week I found out my partner [24M] had sent nudes and weird messages to two other people, both of which were people I’ve had suspicion about in the past and has asked him not to engage with and he’d previously done something similar in the past with other people but we were able to move past it.

It’s now happened again and I’m not too sure what to do. He seems apologetic, but honestly don’t see how I can throw myself fully into trusting him a third time without being overly controlling and policing (it’s not good for the relationship and I don’t want to do that). I also don’t want to be foolish and fall victim to this a fourth time. I’m really stuck and would appreciate any words of wisdom from people. Should this just be the end?

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LucyDanger_ t1_j2fwgjd wrote

You want words of wisdom, I will abide. The issue is not your partner. The issue is you. I want you to screen shot this response, along with your original post, and show it to your Mother and Father. Seriously. I'm dead serious. If you can share this horrific shit with stranger on Reddit asking for life altering advice about this absolute POS, then ask the two people in your life that actually give a shit.

You're not foolish, you're just in shock. Pack, call Mom and Dad, or sister, or brother, or best friend, get in your car and get the hell out of there. You're worried about being too controlling. Absolutely ridiculous. Go. Today. Now.

Anything less makes you complicit.

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