I've got like eighteen toes now because of those James River Assembly assholes. I really wish they'd stop praying for miracles, because it's hard to find shoes.

Minz55th3rd t1_jd66adh wrote on March 22, 2023 at 2:44 AM

#2,299,300

Tippy Toes

bellsouth_kmart t1_jd66mhf wrote on March 22, 2023 at 2:47 AM

#2,299,318

Holy guacamole haha 😄

Cold417 t1_jd672ax wrote on March 22, 2023 at 2:50 AM

#2,299,362

Replying to New_Boot_Goofin11 (#2,298,786)

You want a toe? I can get you a toe, believe me. There are ways, Dude. You don't wanna know about it, believe me. I'll get you a toe by this afternoon--with nail polish. These fucking amateurs.

New_Boot_Goofin11 t1_jd67qeu wrote on March 22, 2023 at 2:56 AM

#2,299,417

Replying to Cold417 (#2,299,362)

Sir can you please keep your voice down? This is a family restaurant.

TheAmaryllis t1_jd69f6d wrote on March 22, 2023 at 3:10 AM

#2,299,556

Show Me The Toes

(I swear, it's safe for work lol)

falalablah t1_jd6enjf wrote on March 22, 2023 at 3:57 AM

#2,299,951

Replying to Minz55th3rd (#2,299,300)

Tiny Toes

GroovyHeretic t1_jd6hyvz wrote on March 22, 2023 at 4:31 AM

#2,300,191

Somebody let me know if they start making dicks bigger too.

shavedcow t1_jd6mhq6 wrote on March 22, 2023 at 5:23 AM

#2,300,511

Replying to GroovyHeretic (#2,300,191)

That's how we know the story is bunk right from the jump. Bigger dicks would be first priority by a long shot.

bobone77 t1_jd6n6mx wrote on March 22, 2023 at 5:31 AM

#2,300,558

Replying to shavedcow (#2,300,511)

Yep, but that’s just what the women are asking god to do for their husbands. 🤷🏻‍♂️

[deleted] t1_jd6p9zd wrote on March 22, 2023 at 5:58 AM

#2,300,695

[removed]

garlicgekko t1_jd6s8qf wrote on March 22, 2023 at 6:37 AM

#2,300,858

Mental health and mental healthcare are still under serviced here.

snuggle_sauce t1_jd7czl5 wrote on March 22, 2023 at 11:19 AM

#2,302,014

Replying to hardisonthefloor (#2,298,954)

> For a church that clearly has a state-of-the-art video production team, it’s baffling that no one seems to have captured any of this on film.

That whole article is pure comedy gold.

socialistpizzaparty t1_jd7e3fq wrote on March 22, 2023 at 11:31 AM

#2,302,094

Replying to New_Boot_Goofin11 (#2,299,417)

Shomer Shabbos!!!

growth-or-happiness t1_jd7fscd wrote on March 22, 2023 at 11:48 AM

#2,302,223

I want toes. Many toes. And since he can grow them, I need more as my supply is running out. Also....

*It is like when a pastor can claim they can make a leg grow longer. It is all parlor tricks.*

Wrinklestiltskin t1_jd7g5ku wrote on March 22, 2023 at 11:51 AM

#2,302,243

Replying to garlicgekko (#2,300,858)

Don't confuse mental illness with stupidity. You're stigmatizing metal illness using it as an insult. Stop that..

growth-or-happiness t1_jd7gwte wrote on March 22, 2023 at 11:59 AM

#2,302,300

Replying to growth-or-happiness (#2,302,223)

I am replying to myself again. My grandpa and dad didn't have all of those slight of hand books for no reason. They used the same techniques to pull money from people. It was magic! No it wasn't. There was a reason why they went to prison for mail fraud, they knew people were dumb. And well, it was the 80's, so that was rampant. Religion was and is always easy. I have respect for those that use religion to help others, but that isn't so common anymore these days. See Joel Osteen, or JRC.

Punkerkas t1_jd7haz0 wrote on March 22, 2023 at 12:02 PM

#2,302,336

Replying to sourdoughbreadlover (#2,298,949)

Isn’t Goldfinger, the main pastor whatever his crooked name is, missing a finger? Why didn’t god give him his finger back too? Not exactly a toe but still close enough eh?

also form 13909 just in case

Napdaily t1_jd7hzm3 wrote on March 22, 2023 at 12:09 PM

#2,302,389

Growing toes! That's crazy! But a virgin birth everyone is on board with!? It's all the same Christian nuttary!

Charlotte_the_cat t1_jd7ivl7 wrote on March 22, 2023 at 12:17 PM

#2,302,470

Sure wish God had given my mom back her legs when she was still alive.🙄

_ism_ t1_jd7jzyr wrote on March 22, 2023 at 12:26 PM

#2,302,569

Replying to sourdoughbreadlover (#2,299,026)

You'll have to get rid of one if you want another middle finger. Otherwise you'd have one middle finger and one extra other finger but both of them would be sharing the position of the middle. If you flipped people off with them both they wouldn't understand.