Did you really FU, though? You learned a lesson about yourself. You should take some god damned pride in that. You don't understand how many people get to twice your age without realizing things like this. If you want to see how far ahead of the crowd you are with this realization, go out to a club for older patrons and see how many guys (and tbh, ladies) in their 50s are still desperately chasing tail for the sake of it.