Submitted by No_Syllabub_4264 t3_125w9ux in tifu
So my workplace has become quite rich in languages as more newcomers are immigrants. I learned as a kid that when getting to know new people with different languages it’s good to learn how to be polite in the new language. More is better of coarse, but basic manners should be a must. So I can say ’good morning’, ’thank you’ and ’you’re welcome’ in a few different language. Not much else, I forget easily.
This week I studied from the internet a new ’good morning’. Today I used the term exitingly to a new co-worker with a language barrier, who doesn’t speak my language more than a couple words. I was giddy that I can tell her good morning in her language. I should have double checked, as it seems I used wrong ending.
She got frustrared and scolded me, corrected which enging I should have used, and with a long rant I can only assume the meaning of, reminded that she HAS to and WANTS to learn my language and I’m NOT helping if I start using hers. She’s lovely and calm personality so I must have hit a massive nerve!
I got so embarrased and felt my face get red. I clearly picked a wrong moment and wrong method to try be polite.
TL;DR said good morning incorrectly to a co-worker in her language, when she is trying hard to learn mine.
NTGenericus t1_je696jw wrote
So it has taken me years and years to realize that people often don't like to be seen in terms of their ethnicity. When that happens they're immediately "othered" and pointedly different. If they're just trying to fit in and get along like everyone else, pointing out their difference can cause self-consciousness or be insulting. I'm on the spectrum and I made so many people uncomfortable just by trying to be familiar with them on what I saw as their own terms. It's best to just ignore any differences and treat them like everyone else. Let them fit in without being "different".