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raz0rflea t1_j6k3s3i wrote

In all honesty, you shouldn't have to be exhausted at 19 putting up with an older sibling's tantrums. She might have mental health issues so I'm not judging her but whether she does or not, it's not fair that your parents have let her get away with acting like this without addressing it. I mean I assume this behaviour hasn't come out of nowhere from the way you talk about how you feel like you should have anticipated it.

If you have the option, it might be worth talking to a counsellor yourself just to get an outside perspective on things and maybe some practical advice on how to manage this situation. It's fucked that you need to anticipate whether any little thing you do is gonna unleash world war 3 at home constantly, and it's a drain on your own mental health that you don't need.

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Mission-Handle-9033 OP t1_j6k7s8l wrote

It’s kind of always been like this. I do see a therapist, and take antidepressants/anti anxiety meds, which helps a lot. It’s sort of just the way things shake out, when you throw in the fact that my mom’s sick and exhausted herself. I’d moved out, but after she was hospitalized she begged me to come back to help manage everything. It still doesn’t feel fair sometimes though, and I really appreciate the empathetic words 💙

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raz0rflea t1_j6l4pf0 wrote

I am glad you're doing what you can to look after yourself! I had a aimilar situation with my older brother who we all had to walk on eggshells around and be ready to do whatever he wanted to keep him calm, and it isn't fair and it is really exhausting so I feel ya!

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Mission-Handle-9033 OP t1_j6l63xy wrote

Thank you, it’s really nice and rare to find someone who can sympathize. It’s a really terrible dynamic when everyone KNOWS the behavior is not normal/acceptable, but you’re all much too tired to really fight them on it anymore. Most people don’t really believe me when I talk about my experiences with her, especially from when I was younger. I’m sorry you had to experience that, but again, I appreciate the empathy, and hope that your situation is either already improved or improves soon.

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