Another useless fact I can use at parties that I am forced to be at. Thank you!

"Dumber than a sponge" now carries a lot more weight.

I read more than halfway through before I realized that this wasn’t about kitchen sponges.

You're ahead of me then. I read the whole thing before my brain caught up and said "wait what" and had to reread.

A few of you will be forced through a fine mesh screen for your planet. They'll be the luckiest of all.

3M hates this one simple trick

The key to victory is the element of surprise. Surprise!

I was gonna say "poor sponges!" but I think plants might actually feel more pain than sponges lol

Ok. Gotta comment on your username… nuclear fire (pyro) plant (phyte)… that is impressively badass.

I thought this was a LPT to cut your kitchen sponge in half to get twice the use out of it.

What about sponges of the same species?

I would imagine the sponges are also not big fans of it.

No, less. Sponges are now cleverer than we thought, thus diminishing the insult somewhat.

Had to google it to be sure but "conspecific" in this sentence means "of the same species"

"These consist of pushing into contact different species (xenograft) or conspecific individuals (allograft) with their outer pinacodermal layers intact."

So, same species is covered in this too.

No, I bet it's being studied to make an organic terminator police force to keep us proles in line.

It does, depending where/when you are. What do you think we used before plastic?

This also works with a scrub daddy and a scrub mommy

missed godly/divine (theos = god)

Agreed. I was thinking The. And confused by the random o … divine makes way more sense

For me it was 4/5ths of the way through that “2 different sponges” actually mean 2 different species of sponge

I was literally picturing a ‘slurry’ of yellow and green ground up sponge

To be fair, the answer to that question is, for most people, not "sea sponges". Cloths and brushes were far more common.

Now I'd love to know what they're doing in the lab that discovered this.

What they're doing other than pushing sponges through sieves presumably? ;)

“Many of you will die, and that is a sacrifice im willing to make”-Zapp Brannigan

I just tried this at home and my sponges are now a wreck! My wife is furious that I ruined all the sponges! This is crazy!

I actually think that quote is from Lord Farquaad

Oh, you’re right! But I know it’s a Futurama quote too.

Um...what did sponges do to you to deserve that, research person?

"Some of you may die, but that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make"

"Ah, Emperor ZubZub. Once again we meet at last"

Whhhhhoooooo lives in a pineapple under the sea?

Ooooohhhh sponge animals

They forgot the pickles!

Makes me think of the Thymus. Perhaps they feature that encoding built in, hence this becomes to them, a simple feat.

My day is ruined then

I whole ass thought this was about kitchen sponges until the species line. I was like what the fuck are they doing to sponges??

Edit: wait, what the fuck do you mean sponges can re aggregate. Why aren't they dead.