Forgive me, I picked up a bout of covid so my brain is a little foggy. You should post your own pictures of it and not put it below.

I go through there a fair amount, I'll definitely swing by on my next way through.

Really? That's pretty cool! I'll have to definitely check that out.

TBF, this was only 5 years after the fall of the Wall. So there were large swaths of it just falling into urban decay. It wasn't until much later that people started to think to preserve it.

BL is great, been here for 8 years. It's def gotten better and there are some spots that are better than others, but so happy with our space and neighbors.

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Never had a problem in years of waiting at the Garfield station.

I am headed there tomorrow. I'll be Lord Farquaad.

>Golgafrincham Ark Fleet Ship B

Look, I totally get your feeling and reference, that I'm a useless human in a useless job.

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But the assumption that everyone on the planet just......gets dating isn't rational.

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Years ago, I would only get late 40s men at the end of their rope, so to speak. Nowadays, I have lots of clients in their early 20s, just wanting to learn how to better themselves, which I think is awesome.

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After all, don't we all want and deserve love?

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“I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.”

I think there's definitely an aspect of that going on. Look, dating (like everything we do) is a complex mix of biology, psychology, sociology and anthropology. Evolutionary psychology is great for explaining or looking at a certain set of data. But that is just data. For instance, studies show, "we" like symmetrical faces more than asymmetrical, "we" like long silky hair, "we" like women with 7:10 hip to waist ratio. If you ONLY go with that data, it can be surmised that perhaps we are looking for the healthiest mate, perhaps of good breeding age. But that doesn't take into factor ALL the other shit and baggage that make us human.

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For instance, women may biologically be attracted to men with more testosterone (hairier, bigger, wilder), but psychologically unattracted to them because they see them as "dumb jocks." (I am over generalizing and over simplifying things, but you get the idea.)

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So the idea of only one set of data driving our dating and mating drives is a little too simplistic. It's an AMAZING area of research that I love and devour, but it's just a part of a larger whole.

Obviously I could speak an hour on each of those questions, but that's the marrow and gist of them!

"The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else."

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But seriously, but finding something else to focus on and enjoy. Whether that's a new hobby, new activity or the company of a new individual. Once you have something else that joyfully takes up your mental bandwidth, you'll find yourself thinking less and less about it until it becomes a non-issue.

Sure thing! Here are some quick and dirty answers.

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Trust? By doing the small things that you said you would early in a relationship. Be on time. Remember promises and dates. Follow through. Keep your word. These are all relatively small individually, but collectively, they tell you a lot about how the person values you and if they are trustworthy.

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Rekindle the spark? Creating new memories. By this I mean doing things for the first time. When we do that, we create dopamine, seratonin, cortisol and other chemicals that create emotion that create memories. They can be small things like picking up a hobby together or big things like moving or traveling.

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How to know if someone is for you? Basically by the reverse. By making sure you can identify the people that are WRONG for you as quickly as possible. You can never be sure about the future, but you can keep your eyes open for red flags and go all in with the best possible hand. Any little thing at the beginning, turns into a big thing in a relationship. So make sure you're okay with everything now, before the relationship gets put under stress mode.

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How to look at the now? Heard this recently: "If you're angry, you're living in the past. If you're worried, you're living in the future. Just concentrate on the now and that's where you'll find all the joy." I know that's easier said than done, but the past is immovable, nothing we can do to change it. But we CAN change our present. Don't let your past get in the way of your future.

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Hope these helped!

Well considering over 1/8th of folks in the US have is (~13%), it not uncommon and it's not the "devil" that it's made to seem in the health books. Yes, it can be serious if left untreated, but it's a very manageable thing. It's virtually impossible for someone with no sores (which is most of the time) to give it to someone else.

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It's not the "wear a condom for life," it's, "there'll be a small risk, but since we have good communication, we'll be honest with each other."

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But personally, if I loved someone and wanted to spend my life with them, I'd just say "F it," and get it with them and jauntily skip down HPV Lane together into the sunset.

Basically what I tell people is that open or poly relationships are for when you've "mastered" 1-on-1 relationships and are ready to start playing on hard mode, lol.

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But what I'm getting that is many times I hear it (similar to having a kid) used trying to save or repair a relationship. That's not going to work and it's usually just going to make it even more challenging.

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But if you guys have a solid relationship and a great and open line of communication, it's not crazy at all. But like any decision in a relationship (money, kids, religion), you just want to make sure you're both doing it for the right reasons. The best way to go about is just as you've said, with open communication and boundaries. Also, you don't need to rush anything. Take a few baby steps and get to know people in the communities, that way you can keep checking in with each other to make sure you're all on the same page.

Sounds good!

Luxury imbibable social adult beverages!

I'm on the other side of Berry Lank Park, but I walk there with mine. Hope to see you there my friend!

Luxury beer!

I might hit this up with my wife and kids. Thought I'd throw it out there!

This is great! Good for you for organizing this.

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My wife actually put an add up on Craigslist years ago to make more female friends and we ended up going to the wedding of one of them.

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Making friends can be hard. As a married dude, we don't normally just......meet new dudes. I ended up making the Dads Group here and have met some great dads!

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Keep up the good work!