Landlubber77

Landlubber77 t1_j5i3il8 wrote

🎶 Things are sick and twisted from too much sun and Nazis. Sex, meth, and death fetishes, both of them have got these. Guaranteed not to bore ya, it's Germany or Florida 🎶

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Landlubber77 t1_j5fx4ld wrote

The carpentry accident was just a cover, he lost the finger to that squirrel he took in from the wild. Further proof that you can't ever trust a feral squirrel, no matter how long they've been domesticated.

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Landlubber77 t1_j5a26db wrote

> In over 80% of cases, the extra lid forms on the right eye, while less than a fifth see it appear on the left. The concensus amongst Biologists is that this is due to the anticlockwise circulation of the wind in areas rife with camel populations.

Wait so literally three lids, not three pairs of lids? Also, why would the circulation of the wind make a difference? Do the camels only walk in one direction their whole lives?

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Landlubber77 t1_j59muhc wrote

It all seemed a little far fetched until they got to the part where Bruce Willis used a dump truck full of gold bricks to surf a gigantic wave through an aqueduct and then the authorities couldn't deny how likely this was to actually happen and began their investigation.

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Landlubber77 t1_j3b9y08 wrote

Brother, crispy onion straws are a thing, and a beautiful one at that. Sometimes they're an add-on to your steak at a fancy steak house, or an add-on to your burger at a non-fancy Applebee's. Either way they're delish, like yummy fried air. And you weren't far off on your initial impression of me, I definitely love me some ranch and/or blue cheese.

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Landlubber77 t1_j2ffi80 wrote

We often give out best nuggets as life drains from us. "Jefferson lives;" "this is no time to be making enemies;" "either that wallpaper goes or I do;" "more weight;" "capital punishment, those without the capital get the punishment;" "hurry it up, you Hoosier bastard! I could hang a dozen men while you’re screwing around!” etc.

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