Waitsfornoone
Waitsfornoone t1_ja8i7os wrote
The only thing you have to fear is sphere itself.
Waitsfornoone t1_ja8hn4r wrote
Reply to comment by [deleted] in What do you call a blind fascist? by toothyninja13
Thus concludes another episode of "Bots gone wild!"
Waitsfornoone t1_ja8h46e wrote
Reply to comment by Mockhachiman86 in A farmer drove to a neighbour's farmhouse and knocked at the door... by Gaphumbala
... per each mount.
Waitsfornoone t1_ja5ka2r wrote
Reply to Why did the sailor ground his son? by Mkvrgic420
The kid is now both grounded and underwater.
Waitsfornoone t1_ja5g1x1 wrote
Celebration day.
Waitsfornoone t1_ja5ftic wrote
Gum ... if it's far enough in the bum.
Waitsfornoone t1_ja5f0g3 wrote
Did you hear about the Holocaust?
The Jews did Nazi that one coming.
Waitsfornoone t1_ja43qmz wrote
Reply to Whaddaya call a whore with fat ankles? by [deleted]
Nope, still Cankles.
Waitsfornoone t1_ja43hfh wrote
Reply to A man goes to the bank to apply for a loan by germsburn
Sally!
Waitsfornoone t1_ja433n6 wrote
I'm thankful that at least her name is .... Marge.
Waitsfornoone t1_ja41wnl wrote
Reply to comment by dubbzy104 in The first rule of Assumption Club is by Gil-Gandel
It is!
Waitsfornoone t1_ja3nptq wrote
Reply to comment by DrLycFerno in There are 7.888 billion people on earth by SecurityNo1814
8.01
Waitsfornoone t1_ja3niod wrote
Reply to I love watching Friends! by liamsitagem
... with a light on.
Waitsfornoone t1_ja3k3zv wrote
Why am I suddenly hungry?
Waitsfornoone t1_j9wq5ij wrote
I recall 2nd grade rather fondly.
Waitsfornoone t1_j9w5inz wrote
Reply to comment by palebluedotcitizen in “If I died before you, would you remarry?” by [deleted]
Yep, this one is low effort/low impact.
Waitsfornoone t1_j9vy7lt wrote
Reply to comment by Leather-You4318 in What's the worst thing about Austria? by HBNTrader
... and that guy you promised is very aware.
Waitsfornoone t1_j9vy2c6 wrote
Reply to comment by nukeemtilltheyglow in What's the worst thing about Austria? by HBNTrader
>French Lick
Known for its' Birds.
Waitsfornoone t1_j9hezzi wrote
You had me at polish - I thought the guy was going to polish the magic lamp and have wonderful things happen.
Waitsfornoone t1_j9c3qov wrote
Reply to comment by DutchOfBurdock in How do I say I hate you in a nice way? by CoolEqual
>"You're where fun goes to die!"
FTFY.
Waitsfornoone t1_j9c3dgk wrote
Reply to comment by windmillninja in How do I say I hate you in a nice way? by CoolEqual
Even if you're not from the South ....
Waitsfornoone t1_j6t3yon wrote
... and other stuff, but I lost track.
Waitsfornoone t1_j6pfca7 wrote
Plastic Surgeons are not known for their humor.
Waitsfornoone t1_j6p6oa7 wrote
Reply to Why say you swallow cum? by PuffedRabbit
I thought OP was heading for this old classic:
A man who has just died finds himself standing at the gates of Heaven. To his right he sees an attractive woman, and to his left is a ladder. The woman says, "Come with me through the gate and spend eternity with me, or climb the ladder to success." The man, always eager to get ahead in life, chooses to climb the ladder.
The man finds an even more beautiful woman standing in front of another gate. Next to her is another ladder. The woman says, "Come with me through the gate and all your fantasies will be granted, or climb the ladder to success." This time the man is tempted, but his greed takes over and he climbs the ladder higher.
He again encounters a woman. This woman, however; is the most beautiful woman he has ever seen. She says, "come with me and I will satisfy your deepest desires forever, or climb the ladder to success."
​
The man can't believe his luck. He decides to take his chances and climbs the ladder. He comes to another gate. This time there is no woman waiting for him, but a fat, balding, sweaty man instead.
"Are you God?" the man asks. "No," the sweaty man replies. "I'm Cess."
H/T u/68024
Waitsfornoone t1_ja8k0p2 wrote
Reply to What drugs do ducks do? by CK_HAMAD48
You quack me up.